Headline: Religious Whale Charged with Magnet-Filled Breathing Offense  Subtitle: Authorities shocked as marine mammal found violating magnetic air regulations Image: A giant whale with a halo above its head, surrounded by floating magnets and underwater chargers Body: In a shocking turn of events, a spiritual whale has been charged with illegally filling its blowhole with magnets to enhance its breathing abilities. Authorities were baffled to find the majestic creature meditating underwater with a pocketful of charging devices. The whale, known for its religious fervor, was heard chanting ancient hymns while surrounded by a magnetic aura, leading to a fin-tastic investigation into spirituality gone technologically astray.