Headline: The Living Shoulder Hat Runs the Look, Not the Person  Subtitle: A sentient accessory migrates from head to shoulder, bringing unsolicited style advice and executive decisions to the fashion table. Image: A moss-green felt hat perched on a pale shoulder, brim angled with discernment, a tiny synthetic antenna twitching and a stitched eye blinking sarcasm. The scene is a neon-lit street in a sprawling future city, with reflections of holographic adverts on chrome surfaces. Body: A hat grew a personality and migrated to the shoulder, instantly stealing the spotlight from every selfie. In a bold leap for accessory-kind, the living shoulder hat now dictates fashion tempo, sipping rainwater and approving outfit changes with a twitch of its brim. Wearers report it offers unsolicited life counsel, muttering things like 'maybe try confidence on a higher shelf' and 'your shoes could use a vacation'. The era of hats with opinions has arrived, and no one is left hatless.